I live in toronto.

I am:

  • the tall dark and friendly stranger, you might meet on the street
  • a taoist (full of hope and into change).
  • an artist
  • an actor
  • an uncle
  • adventurous
  • a past and future dreamer
to do list:  edit : finally found one of my other lists though just a chunk of it, done when I had money and someone else to do them with as that was part of those items (you will not know which ones they are as there is no point in posting it with “with someone”)
(note items may be removed due to adult or illegal nature)  Adult nature content removed(#: 123 )
  • find love or a lover… 
  • travel to switzerland and hike the mountains there
  • make my own wine
  • carve something amazing 2014
  • paint something amazing
  • sculpt something amazing 2014
  • be a goth for a day
  • be a punk for a day
  • be myself more
  • go to one of every religions church services (or some form of ceremony, so long as I experience the religion)
  • learn how to operate a multi-line phone system (turns out I actually learned how to do this at the one cashier job)
  • trip to somewhere exotic – new caledonia Iles des Pins No point anymore I waited too long
  • jump off a bridge
  • swim in a pool filled with jello (man was that near deadly)  do not do without scuba gear and a guy with a crane that can lift you out
  • bathtub full of pudding (infections in places in ways that just augh…)  Do not do this
  • mudbath  (not in the ears -infection)
  • food fight
  • one floor tall card house
  • love someone with all I am
  • wear something colorful
  • scuba dive
  • travel somewhere random
  • learn japanese
  • own your own chunk of land…
  • build a home on that land (or move into a house)
  • allow others into that home so you share yourself with them and let them do the same with you (even if it is an apartment you can do this again later with a real house)
  • actually go to another continent
  • surf
  • be an elvis impersonator for a day
  • get my six pack of abs back had and then lost for a brief 2 weeks but it still counts
  • translate a game
  • smile at strangers you think are cute
  • try to talk to these cute strangers so that they aren’t strangers and maybe friends or boy/girlfriends
  • take some things more seriously and some other things less seriously
  • skydive
  • dress up in real funky way on a day that doesn’t call for that…
  • be body painted
  • spend a day making someone else happy
  • quit job in a spectacular way
  • take credit for something
  • take a photograph of myself doing something on the list
  • take a creepy photo
  • see the sunrise and set on the same beach or vice versa without leaving that beach or sleeping in between
  • acupuncture
  • say no really rudely
  • teach someone something they really need to know
  • help a charity in a major way
  • build an origami army
  • be in a origami sailing race
  • be in rubber ducky race
  • paper airplane race
  • stop an abusive relationship
  • Shake hands with the President of the United States, prime minister
  • Save someone’s life
  • bungee jumping (er, more to it that that)
  • Be an extra in a movie
  • Go on a cruise (more to it than this)
  • climb a mountain (more to it than this)
  • wild cherry picking
  • hot air ballon ride
  • tea ceremony (again more to it)
  • kiss someone under a flowered arch
  • Attend a balloon festival
  • Host an outdoor movie night (possibly at the beach)
  • buy and learn to play a musical instrument 2103
  • eat at golden dragon restaurant bangkok

The first time they told me ‘three months” I panicked.  I made a list literally 5 minutes after leaving that appointment.  I had done 5+ by that night.  2 and half months in I finished all but 4 items on that list (out of a hundred).  I wasn’t just motivated… the word driven… whatever it took to cross the item off I did.  Now I am looking for direction.  As the items left of the 2nd and 3rd list… sure I have the lists but I am not as driven to finish them… Or I would have done them already.   That sense of accomplishment was not the same as getting a perfect score on a test, or other people telling me I did a good job.  This was stuff that meant something to me, that meant alot that I had done what I set out to do.Sure love someone with all my heart is and has been technically done… but love is something that took and takes time.Making wine… its on the list but not that important as technically I have made wine (twice) with someone else.  It just wasn’t my wine.  But technically it is done, just not in way that really matters to me.  In a sense it wouldn’t really matter if I did do it.I am trying not to lose hope but the few that are left that do mean something have been downgraded on their scope to up the chance of getting them done.  It still leaves a long list of to do’s….This is 20 something times they have given me the “deadline”.  A part of me doesn’t take it seriously anymore as that is 20 odd times of telling me I am going to die soon and it didn’t happen.My instincts are telling me up the pace and move on.  Yes leaving behind love…  I am being torn by love and the need to accomplish.I still get the feeling my words cannot express my emotions here.Death could be five minutes away, but love is only as close as I let it.I know you are thinking why choose between the two why not bring your lover with you… somethings aren’t that simple.Why should I tear up their lives for something on a list.  That has been tearing me up with conflict over how much it means to me to get it done.I don’t know if you will ever understand.  That is okay… I have met only a few people who truly understand this part of me.  Part of the problem is that my lover doesn’t understand this.  Which complicates my need to finish the list.Who would you bring back to life if you could?
No one, they can live on happily in my memory.

Music I listen to:

Artists in specific
Bran Van 3000
Diana Ross
Ellie Goulding
Elvis Presley
Flight facillities
Hed Kandi
John Legend
Mistress Barbara
Robbie Rivera
St. Germain
Sylvia Tosun
The clash

Favorite Zoids character Moonbay (ムンベイ) (she’s so cute)
Facorite dragon quest characters torneko, the jester class.

(16/12/2012) The television just asked me if the world ended now would you consider your life well lived.  Since I have been sick this last week and had just woken up from a nightmare that pretty much was the exact same thing, well… this was yet another one of those weird situations in my life.  Its the whole reason I have lists like this.  There is so much I would still like to do.

Would you consider your life well lived?

just HUH… sigh

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